Cavalia's Odysseo in Scottsdale through Jan. 13

I love seeing beautifully choreographed shows. It's one reason I love going to Vegas - tons of beautiful costumes, soothing music, amazing acrobatics, etc.

Lucky for me, I got a chance to preview Cavalia's new show, Odysseo. I only saw select scenes, and it's gorgeous.

Odysseo features equestrian arts and acrobatics on a high-tech theatrical stage that includes a working carousel and an 80,000-gallon lake. I'll let some pictures show you what to expect.

My daughter's mouth was agape almost the entire preview. Many amazing riding tricks, gorgeous costumes and athleticism. The set was beautiful. Now the big screen could be amazing, but at times the video seemed too grainy. Still, you felt transported to a beautiful place.

This obviously isn't for everyone. The music is mellow, and if you don't like horses or acrobatics, well... But if you like theatrical experiences, this was a beautiful one.

Ticket prices range from $29.50-$149.50. The theater, under a huge 10-story white tent, is cozy. Even those cheaper, high-up seats aren't that far away from the action. That's good news if ticket costs are an issue. Taking a family can be expensive, especially if you go for a VIP package. But if you are looking for a memory rather than a gadget for Christmas, this could be a nice family outing. Click link for Cavalia's Odysseo show info & tickets.

Drillmaster me fails every time

I chose to quit a very full-time job a few months ago partly so I could be on top of my son's school work. High school grades matter, and my fear is my inattention because of work would mean he'd never go to college. Crazy? Maybe. It's my fear.

So I've been on top of him this past quarter. He gets work done, hating every moment. At least it seems that way. He especially loves when I ask, "Can you explain this to me?" and "Where's your work?" This means writing more sentences or showing how he solves math problems. Short answers don't seem good in high school, and right answers don't mean you get points. Work matters. He looks at me incredulously every time. "But it's the right answer!"

His grades, sadly, are just marginally better than when I was working and glancing to see if he was doing homework. Why? Well, he still doesn't show work. Grr! And he doesn't always turn in homework. What!? Yes, all that frustration over doing it, and yet sometimes he doesn't turn it in. That baffles me. Why do it if you don't get a grade for it? Maybe a good night's sleep makes him forget the crazy mom puts him through to get homework done.

He's a teen. I know they aren't always organized. I'm hoping it gets better. Drillmaster me isn't exactly working.

Why I loved watching 'Ruby Sparks' with my tween

When I had the chance to preview Ruby Sparks before the movie was released, already I was thinking how great it would be to take my 12-year-old daughter to see this R-rated movie. Sure, there were a few "unconfortable-for-a-parent" discussions. But, I just knew our conversation about the movie would be awesome. It'd be the kind that helps a mom figure out how a daughter views relationships. This was a must. At least it was for me. :)

I decided to wait for the DVD, which came out Oct. 30. Ruby Sparks is now one of my daughter's favorite movies. She's put it on her Christmas list, since I only had the DVD on loan. Seriously.

The movie is R-rated for the adult situations and language. There's talk about sex, some profanity (including many F-words, but not as many as some cable shows) and a scene where some characters share a joint. These aren't things that I shy away from discussing with her. These are situations she will encounter in life. Better she get my thoughts on it than sneak in a movie and take her friend's opinions as the only truth.

If you've not heard of this movie, do check out the trailer:

My daughter and I spoke about ideal relationships, writing, controlling people, changing people, imperfection, etc. We spent a lot of time talking about Calvin's decision to rewrite his character, and how what he thought he wanted wasn't always really what he intended, as well as consequences of someone having the upper hand in a relationship. We're still taking about the movie, a week later.

Some possible questions, should you watch with your tween or teen:

-What are the pros and cons of being able to control another person's behavior? Might it be fun for a while or plain wrong?

-If you could, would you want to control how others act around you? On the flip side, how would you feel if someone could control you?

-How did it make you feel when Calvin started purposefully controlling Ruby?

-Have you thought about how you wish you could change other people (friends, family)? Has this film changed your mind about that?

-Can relationships ever reach perfection for either person? Explain.

-Would you end the movie in the same way?

Here's hoping there is a good deal on the DVD in the next few weeks. Mom, here, may just give in to this Christmas request. :)

Cheers!

Tips for enjoying Universal Studios Hollywood

We've been to Universal Studios four or five times now. We went twice in Orlando and two or three times in Hollywood. Is it terrible if I can't remember? We've gone every couple of years since our daughter turned 3.

We recommend it if you have at least school age children. While there are fun things for preschoolers, you will enjoy the park more if your child is old enough to ride the attractions.

According to the Universal Studios website: The Transformers and Simpsons rides require being 40 inches tall; Jurassic Park has a minimum height of 42 inches; and the Mummy ride requires riders to be 48 inches tall. Shows can be quite entertaining for all, and several attractions — Shrek 4D, Terminator 2: 3D and Studio Tour (including King Kong 360 3-D) — allow you to just sit and watch.

Here's how we made the most of our day and a half at the park. Since we've gone before, we knew what we wanted to see and do (the new stuff and the cool stuff — all personal preferences).

We started by buying tickets at Costco. Offers vary from store to store, but we found 2-day passes for $64 each. The ticket allows you to use your second day within 90 days of the first use; and the first use has to take place before Dec. 31, 2012. Since we don't plan to return until maybe 2014 (we want the kids to be old enough to be part of a studio audience), we opted to go two consecutive days.

However, if we thought we'd go more often, we would have opted for the Universal Studios deal of the moment: Buy a day at the park and enjoy the rest of 2012 and 2013 for free. Blackout days do apply. This is a great deal if you are a regular traveler to the LA-area.

We then started looking for hotels in the area. We didn't want to spend a ton of time stuck in traffic. Seems being stuck in traffic adds to everyone's stress, and we start the day in a bad mood. That's not what we wanted. But the hotels within walking distance of the park seemed pricey, so I started looking on priceline.com and Hotwire.com. I could see the possibility of a much lower rate, but no guarantee I'd get the hotel I wanted. So then I called one of the hotels — the one that I saw had a complimentary continental breakfast and snacks service in the evening. This could be a huge food savings unless the food wasn't what we wanted to eat.

I let the reservation agent know the lowest rate I saw, and if she could get me something close. She ended up telling me of a deal where the first night is full price, but the second is 40 percent off. The savings was $100 off, so I booked it.

I hoped the food would help cut out dining out bill, and it did. The evening snacks ended up including complimentary wine and beer, and the sampling of food was good. For breakfast, I had two ham croissants with a side of cinnamon oatmeal and Starbucks coffee. My son went to town on pastries. My daughter loved the cereal and fruit. We were all satisfied and only needed to snack at the park before dinner.

As for the evening snacks, there weren't tons, but there was a nice spread of cheeses, veggies and finger foods. Did I mention the free beer and wine? The selection was limited, but the wine and beer were rather nice touches after a long day out.

At the park, we didn't have to deal with shuttles or parking since it was a 5-10 minute walk. Tickets in hand, we only had to stand in the entry line.

We started the day on the lower lot to make sure we hit the Transformers: The Ride 3D. This was one of the new attractions since we last went. We then hit Revenge of the Mummy and Jurassic Park the Ride, both old favorites. Lines were short since it was a Monday, so we did a few repeats.

Then we headed to the upper lot. Happens the Simpson's Ride always seemed to have a 25- to 35-minute wait, so we hopped in. You're entertained by show clips, so the wait doesn't feel as long. We then did the Studio Tour — another attraction with long waits because of the King Kong 360 3-D experience. Very cool! You feel as though you are in the middle of the jungle with Kong and the T-Rex he fights. Another bonus of the tour: Jimmy Fallon offers some funny commentary via video.

We wanted to see House of Horrors, but it was closed. We'll need to return another time for that. Then we made time for the shows we've enjoyed in the past, including Shrek 4D, Special Effects Stage and Terminator 2: 3D. We skipped Waterworld and Animal Actors. Our kids aren't into the kiddie play areas anymore, so the splash pads and foam balls at the Curious George and Dinoplay areas were ignored. They are a lot of fun for all ages, though.

Day Two: We made sure to repeat the four rides we enjoyed most: Studio Tour, Transformers, Mummy and Jurassic Park. We also made time to take a few photos with characters.

Oh, we did hit one big glitch, which could have wrecked the day. Our studio tour was cut short because of a water line break. As we were escorted off the backlot, we paid attention to the daily password given to jump to the front of the

line on the Transformers ride. We also asked (super nicely) to jump the line when we returned to the studio tour. The employee allowed it (I suppose he could have said no), so we got to ride in the front car for the first time. I have to say I like car 3 or 4 best. Don't recall being in car 2.

We left feeling like we got to do everything we wanted. We grabbed a bite before our 6-hour drive home. We also lucked out not having to pay more than $4.49 for a gallon of gas.

Tip: Gas up in Quartzsite, Ariz. Once you hit California, gas shoots up in price. When we went, it was about 75 cents a gallon more.

Cheers!

Avoiding theme park vacation disaster

We just got back from a quick trip to California, as many Arizona families do any chance they can.

We've had our share of intense theme park vacations, but we keep doing them because they can be quite fun, and great for bonding if you don't let the little things ruin the day(s) you spend at the park.

Here's what I've learned:

-Get your child's input. If you just do what you want to do, they will complain. We check out the theme park's website together and list the most important attractions or shows. Then we make sure everyone's top three things get done early in the trip. It takes the pressure off the rest of the trip.

-Know the ride restrictions. If you talk up something and then your child can't get on, expect disappointment. That said, many of the rides for bigger kids have rider-switch options for parents with little ones. While you wait, talk with your child. Find out what he or she wants to do next and if it's reasonable for your family, then go for it. We used to get churros or ice cream after when my daughter was too small for some rides. Letting them pick the next thing to do may make your child feel a little better about missing out on that special ride.

-Don't pack too much into your day. You'll end up with a lot of very tired people, and tired people tend to get grumpy.

-Expect the plan won't be followed. Things happen. Rides may be closed or lines can take longer than planned; a restaurant may have a super long wait or no kids menu; anyone can end up sick or not wanting to cooperate with the plan, etc. Don't stress about it. Laugh it off, if possible. Don't show your kids a parent tantrum. It will only add stress.

-Make time to not do anything and see what happens.

-Bring some favorite games and play as a family when you get back to your room. We pulled out Monopoly during our most recent trip, and we had tons of fun winding down from a busy day.

-Call ahead. If you are doing a specialty dinner and this is a must in your vacation, check if they take reservations. If they don't, then prepare for an alternate.

-That said, have alternates in your plan. Maybe rides aren't all that fun for some in your party. So maybe you cut out of the park early and go to the beach or a dinner show.

-Give your kids some responsibility as they get older. Let them be the official photographer or evening event planner. Make them take turns, too. You'll create conversation for later and lots of memories.

We had one of the best vacations just following these guidelines. The arguing as almost non-existent, and we did everything — including just vegging out at the hotel — that we wanted to do. Loved it!

Cheers!

Walking to get talking

My daughter is at that age where mom is increasingly less cool. Hanging out to talk just doesn't happen as often. So to connect, I've started going on walks with her. Our latest adventure was walking to a nearby coffee/bagel shop. Instead of jumping in the car, we opted for a brisk walk — gotta walk off at least a few of those calories. The walk also gave us an extra 15-20 minutes together.

We're doing walks around our neighborhood, too. I claim it's for exercise, but it's really to spend time together. We talk about nonsense, but also about friends and school.

I force myself to just listen and only advise when she asks for help. I also try not to judge. I do, however, ask questions to make her think about whatever issue she's dealing with at the moment. I'll throw out questions such as:

-How would you feel if that happened to you?

-Why do you think that happened?

-Would you change how you dealt with that issue?

-Were you bothered by how that was handled?

-Did you think that was weird?...Cool? Fun? Worth it?

I also give her kudos for sharing, and if I think she's handled a situation the best way possible.

And if she asks me if I've ever dealt with XYZ, I answer her question with honesty, but also any lessons learned. I'm thinking the questions will be getting harder very soon.

Here's hoping she keeps wanting to go on these walks.

Cheers!

Lovin' the Balloon Fiesta in Albuquerque

I'm a little sad that we aren't making it to Albuquerque this year for the annual Albuquerque International Balloon Fiesta. The event runs Oct. 6-14 this year. We love escaping to Northern New Mexico in the fall, especially when temps still hit the century mark in Arizona. The weather is so lovely during the day, though it can be quite chilly in the early morning.

As a family, we love going out to see the balloons. It's fun watching crews prep the balloons. Some are friendly and will answer a curious kid's questions. We play games searching for certain balloons, and we take lots of pics. What's best is talking about our day over dinner. Love that bonding!

When we go, we do get up super early to see the mass ascension. It's hard to do when the kids are little because we leave super early. Traffic can be intense getting over to the field. I think it's just as hard as they get older and complain about rising early. To minimize grumpiness, I just always promise them that they can sleep on the ride and get a treat of their choice. I know this may see like a bad mommy tactic (bribery), but it works.

Other quick tips:

-Check the balloon fiesta's website before going to get details on where to park, food, tickets, etc.

-I like to have everyone layer clothing, as it can be very cold in the morning and then quickly warm up in the afternoon.

-Bring a sealed water bottle and a few easy to pack & carry snacks. It saves money, but it also keeps you from standing in a long line until you have to later when you are buying that treat you promised. They will remind you. :)

-Carry sunscreen and wear sunglasses. It's easy to forget that you'll be out in the sun all day when you leave your home/hotel when it's still dark at 4 a.m. to catch the balloons at sunrise.

-Carpool if possible. There is a lot of traffic, and you pay for parking.

-Bring chairs or a blanket if you don't want to be standing all day.

Cheers!

Hispanic Living magazine is now out

I'm so proud of my contribution to Hispanic Living magazine, published by USA Today. I was asked forever ago to help with story ideas and editing. And now it's finally out.

Why am I proud? Because it has a variety of stories that don't fall into stereotypes. And it features people from a variety of Hispanic cultures. We aren't all the same. What culture is?

It covers cultural connections and traditions, such as making tamales, but it also covers new trends such as the growth in cross-cultural marriages, the expansion of tequila bars, and increasing autism rate among Latinos. Features include the importance of education, keys to financial savvy, and finding business success. And there are plenty of great profiles, such as that of actress/Latino activist Rosario Dawson, Labor Secretary Hilda Solis, and Olympian Marlen Esparza, who came home with a bronze in women's boxing.

It's a little difficult to find, though. My mom searched in Albuquerque and in San Antonio, during a recent trip. And a good friend in Austin said she's not found it. That bums me out. So I'm sharing a link to order the Hispanic Living magazine.

I hope you get it and enjoy reading it as much as I did.

Cheers!

Why we love Disney in October

One of my favorite things to do this time of year is visit Disney. The weather is great and it just doesn't feel as crowded as in the spring.

In Orlando, I love it because of the amazing food and wine festival that takes place at Epcot. When I tallied how much we spent two years ago, I was shocked. We didn't budget for it on our visit. Oops! But, the entire family had a great time tasting a variety of ethnic dishes, drinks and dessert, as well as listening to some great music. Howard Jones and Sister Hazel rocked.

I like the California park for Halloween fun just a little better because of how they really do up Halloween/Christmas at the Haunted Mansion with plenty of pumpkins, wrapped headstones and Jack Skellington. That wasn't the case in Orlando when we went two years ago. I can't remember the reason why, but we were sad about it.

There's also Ghost Galaxy that takes over Space Mountain. We love that ride, but it's just a little better with all the nebula spirits popping up and looking as if they will get us. Then we all pose for the camera. Fun! Plus, we love getting into Halloween.

My absolute favorite activity is Mickey's Halloween Party - celebrated in both Orlando and Anaheim. It's just so much fun. We're looking to do it again before the kids get too old. Ride lines tend to be much shorter, which makes the extra ticket worth it. Current rates are as low as $46 for annual passholders and go up to $69 at the door on Halloween in Anaheim. Rates are $50.95 to $69.95, plus tax, in Orlando.

In Anaheim this year you can get into Disneyland Park up to 3 hours prior to the event's start time, as well as complimentary parking for one vehicle. Expect trick-or-treat stations (candy & healthy treats), a Halloween-themed fireworks spectacular, a Halloween parade, access to nearly all attractions, including all Space Mountain Ghost Galaxy and Haunted Mansion, and lots of Disney characters, including favorite Disney Villains.

In Orlando this year, where the event is called Mickey's Not-So-Scary Halloween Party at the Magic Kingdom, expect lots of Disney Villains, a Halloween parade and fireworks show, dance parties, candy galore and short ride lines — at least they are short in early October when we went. :)

Oh, I feel as if I need to go back soon. Cheers!

Embracing the Latina inside

I don't like to think of myself as anything other than me.

I don't like labels, so people defining me only by my Hispanic heritage annoy me. Who likes stereotypes anyway?

I love my culture; it's rich in history and has many beautiful aspects. It's part of me and fills me with many great memories, but I don't normally discuss it unless someone else asks. I definitely don't shout it out, and it's not because I'm not proud of who I am. I am.

I've mentioned my Mexican heritage to my kids. I want them to feel proud, especially when there is so much negative sentiment about Hispanics in the news, particularly revolving around immigration. I remember living in the Midwest back in elementary school and being called a "wet back" only because someone learned of my Mexican heritage. My parents were citizens. Hello! It was confusing and hurtful to hear this. I had a long conversation with my parents about stereotypes, racist attitudes and tolerance.

On their dad's side, my kids are a blend of English, German and French. But no one seems to focus on that side.

I don't want anyone making them feel bad about their Hispanic heritage, so I talk up the positives. But we talk about the positives of a lot of different cultures. We all need to be tolerant of our differences. Embrace diversity is a motto of ours. You might learn something.

So I try to share stories about their grandparents and some Hispanic traditions. I want to help them see the beauty of their culture. I've also pointed out that Latinos do great things and can be quite successful. I note politicians, celebs, sports figures and everyday people who are making an impact in their circles. I want them to feel that their heritage isn't an excuse for not finding a path to success.

I've not, however, said that because my kids are partly Hispanic that they must pick up Spanish or traditions. That's really up to them. I'm just sharing what I like about my heritage with them.

So I'm nicely surprised by my daughter wanting to learn to speak Spanish, as well as learn about traditions. My son isn't crazy about learning any language. He'll need to, though, as most colleges seem to require a second language. I've told him Spanish or Mandarin would be great. I think he's leaning toward Spanish so I can help him practice. :)

Some Hispanic friends have asked why I don't make Spanish part of our household. It's the whole "be proud/don't lose your culture" message. I've not forced my kids to speak Spanish because my parents didn't of me. Well, they did tell me I had to take Spanish before French. Spanish made learning French easy.

I learned Spanish because I wanted to learn. Now I want to learn the tradition of making tamales on my own. That's a whole other blog. :) I embrace my heritage because I want to and not because I'm forced to please anyone.

And that's what I hope for my kids.

Cheers!

The stinkies!

Kids get older; they smell.

The odors cling to everything. My most recent discovery is how bad shin guards can stink.

As little kids playing soccer, the only thing that got grimy was the uniform after a fall, but generally because of playing after. Someone always seemed to get their hands into the dirt. Had it not been for this dirt, they could wear their uniforms over a few times.

Not anymore.

OMG!

I remember their shin guards still looking new after many wears. As teens, after a few wears I began to notice a smell. Then I noticed a yellowish tint on the what should be white back sides. Sweat? Yuck!

The stench can be described as putrid, vile, offending, etc.

So I started hand washing these odor collectors. I would use a bit of detergent and scrub. I'm thinking of using baking soda next time. I might have my son start carrying dryer sheets to mask the smell in his backpack, too.

Sharing this article I came across via ehow.com: How to Remove Odor from Shin-Guards

Cheers!

Video chats keeping long-distance friendships close

I remember moving away many times in my childhood. The first time that really mattered was after fourth grade. I would never see my friends again. How could I find such good friends elsewhere? I felt that way again a few years later after another move.

Letters and photographs would be the only way to really connect to these friends. A long-distance phone call was a fortune in the early 80s, so that was out of the question.

Eventually, friendships would fade — it was a lot of work keeping in touch. I maintained one friendship, though, until we both married. Then she moved to Japan, and we lost touch. Yes, I've searched for her on Facebook. I had no luck finding her. :(

My daughter just had a very good friend move away. Both were devastated, as I was so many years ago when I said goodbye to my BFF. But they see each other whenever they want thanks to options like Tinychat, FaceTime and Skype. I'm so jealous!

They connect via text, Facebook or a cell call. Calls are rare, though. Still, they get to "talk" regularly.

Now they do miss just hanging out. It's not like they can go swimming together. And I imagine that watching TV or shopping by phone is not the same.

How lucky, though, to be able to still experience daily life with a friend — to see their expression via video at a joke or story about school. It's immediate gratification, and it keeps the friendship vibrant. There's no waiting for the mail to arrive. If they long to hang out, they can be together with the ease of a click. And that's pretty cool.

Cheers!

Parental anxiety: Bus stop edition

Maybe I'm a helicopter parent. I don't like to think I am. I like my kids to figure things out on their own, and do things on their own. But I can't seem to give up on watching over them in a few areas.

For the longest time, I couldn't let them go to the park on their own. Strangers lurk there. Bad things make the news. I just couldn't let go. Today, they can go with their friends, no problem.

Walking to a friend's house also was out of the question, unless I could see the house. I'd walk them or, given the distance, drive them over. Now they ride over on their bikes, and I'm O.K.

The biggest difficulty I've had lately is letting my daughter go to the bus stop on her own. Work calls, so I can't wait for her to get on the bus. And I get anxious. I just don't want anyone seeing her leave the house and walk solo to the stop, especially the landscapers and construction workers that dot the neighborhood.

I'm trying to get over it. What's helped is arming her with a cell phone. O.K., I did that long before so that she could reach me in case of an emergency. But now, the phone is my virtual eyes. I make her text me when she gets to the stop and on the bus. She looks at me sometimes as though she thinks I'm crazy. Maybe I am??

I just want peace of mind. Too many crazy things happen in this world every day. I want to protect my kids from those awful things forever. And yet, they need to learn to do things on their own.

No text makes me go a little nuts. I called her school once to make sure she arrived. The next time she forgot to text, I was no less anxious, but I didn't call. The school would call if she were absent. That was my reassurance that she was O.K.

My daughter says she's not bothered by my overbearing ways (although sometimes she does look annoyed when I remind her to text). "You're just trying to be a good parent."

Yes I am.

Cheers!

Reconnecting at school: Where does time go?

When school started, I intended to do so many things for my kids. Among them: Get back to being involved in their schools.

And here we are, two weeks before the first quarter ends, and I've missed a school meet-the-teacher event, failed to reached out to any of the parent clubs, and have yet to even make a donation — unless you count that box of tissue.

Being a working parent, time isn't always my own. I love my work. I also love my family. I do my best to balance, but it isn't easy.

My kids have been understanding — maybe too understanding. Hmmm. Guess that's expected as they are now in high school and junior high. But I like staying involved. You get to hear a lot from other parents about students, teachers, and — yes — other parents.

I've been feeling guilty about my lack of involvement this year. The insider info, I think, becomes more valuable as they hit the teen years. At least I know where they stand on grades thanks to the web.

When I start sulking, several mom friends quickly prop me up, saying I'm being too hard on myself. They are right. But at the same time, it's not like I can repeat any of these lost years.

So moving into the next quarter, I've set a few goals for myself to feel more connected to their schools:

-If I can't physically be there, I need to at least touch base by email with teacher to find out if they need anything. I shall find out if there's something I can do from home on the weekend, or provide other classroom support.

-I need to meet more moms for coffee and school updates. So while I might not be able to physically help the school, at least I'll get the insider reports on weekends.

-Make sure to include all school events on my outlook calendar, and set email alerts from their schools. Sticking stuff on the refrigerator doesn't work. And expecting that my angels will tell me about event changes...well, that's taking a gamble that they won't forget.

Cheers!

Am I ready for the back-to-school crazies? No, but do I have a choice?

There's something great about summer as a parent. No homework to check. No projects due the next day. No events that start in the middle of the day. Well, that may not be the case if they are in a rigorous summer camp. But summer generally offers parents of older kids a break.

This summer was quiet and laid back for us. Returning from work, I could actually unwind (OK, only when my work phone wasn't going crazy) and enjoy some time with the kiddies and get some me time. The only prodding that I had to do was summer reading — and cleaning their rooms, but that's a given.

This coming week will create havoc on my already way too full work-life schedule. There's class schedules to pick up, supplies to buy, and orientations to attend. At least I hope to attend them. I have an awful feeling I won't be there for them. School starts July 23.

I'm sooo not ready to give up the fabulousness of summer break.

In just a few days, our lives will be back to super crazy busy. I'm (bad mommy moment here) hoping there aren't too many extracurricular activities to mess up the evening schedule. As a working mom, soccer, band, theater or any other aspirations of the moment mean more shuttling and juggling for me. I wish the day could slow down once dinner is on the table, but that's when homework checks start. We never seem to finish before bed time (here's hoping it's 9:30 p.m., not 11:30 p.m. as it happened a few times last year).

I'm so tired by the time I hit the pillow. Usually I get little time for myself, and I feel blessed with 6 hours of sleep. I really need 8.

Yes, I know I chose to be a parent, and it's part of life but don't tell me that you don't wish there was such a thing as balance without sleep deprivation. A life that doesn't require a nanny (as if we could afford one) or enlisting the help (yes, sometimes begging) of some of your already super busy stay-at-home moms. You know we all ask them for favors to pick up and drop off kids.

I'll be weighing me time (required for keeping me sane) vs. sleep (required to make it through the day). I'd like both. But I won't get what I want. And that's such a bummer.

Tell your child's teacher about SRP Classroom Connections

I was looking through my mail, shocked as always by how expensive it is to stay cool in Arizona. But I'm pleased to know that our electric provider stays actively involved in the community it serves.

One of the programs that aims to build our future is the Classroom Connections grant program. The grants are aimed at helping students with math, science, and social studies, as well as teach a specialty energy program. A blurb in the SRP Contact newsletter, in your bill, says SRP has awarded $126,320 to 26 schools in Learning Grants and $24,915 to 12 schools for Social Studies Grants.

Some general info from SRP website:

Learning Grants: Helps schools, teachers and students to develop projects and programs geared toward attainment of state-mandated competencies. Specifically, the grants support innovative teaching strategies that improve student performance objectives in math and science. SRP offers a total of $125,000 for Learning Grants in math and science, with up to $5,000 available for each school site.

Social Studies: Help educators present academic content and teach skills in the interrelated disciplines of history, geography, civics, government, and economics. Arizona is a diverse and unique state, and SRP is fortunate to have been a part of Arizona's story for more than a century. The total amount of this grant program is $25,000 during this year. Up to $2,000 may be awarded to any one project. There is no minimum.

Powering Our Future mini grants: Classroom teachers in grades 4-12 can receive up to $350 in funding to purchase supplementary materials and supplies to teach the hands-on components of SRP's Powering Our Future curriculum.

The application process will open up again in November. Info and the application is at srpnet.com/grants. You also can call Alison Smith at 602-236-2798 for info.

Street League Skatebording July 14-15

Got older kids at home saying they're bored. You could tell them school is around the corner. Can't believe summer is almost over. Then again, you can opt to surprise them with some skateboarding action taking place at Jobing.com Arena this weekend.

The Street League Skateboarding DC Pro Tour comes to Glendale July 14-15. It's a competition that features 24 pro skateboarders — we're told they are at the top of their game. Honestly, I'm not very familiar with skateboarding champs. I hear these skaters, scheduled to compete, may solicit fan excitement: Sean Malto, Nyjah Huston, Chris Cole, Paul Rodriguez, Ryan Sheckler, Chaz Ortiz, and Torey Pudwill.

The schedule:

Saturday, July 14: Arena doors open at 4 p.m., with qualifying events starting at 5 p.m. An autograph signing for VIP floor seat packages starts at 8:15 p.m. Note: Outdoor activities begin at 2 p.m. before the qualifiers.

Sunday, July 15: Arena doors open at 2:15 p.m. Semi-finals begin at 3:15, with finals beginning at 4 p.m. Note: Just like Saturday, outdoor activities start 2 hours before doors open.

Details: July 14-15. Jobing.com Arena, Loop 101 and Glendale Avenue, Glendale. Tickets run $20.40-$185.80 plus fees, and there are some VIP packages available. 623-772-3200, jobingarena.com.

More info here.

Yearbook memories

My daughter just got her sixth-grade yearbook. I love flipping through the pages to get to know the kids whose names get tossed out throughout the year.

But I really love seeing how kids sign the book. Most are short messages, as expected from a texting generation. Many jot down their cell numbers. Some sign, "Text me!" Other, "HAGS," which mean have a great summer. And I smile. Wow, times have changed.

I can't find my sixth-grade yearbook. But I found one from junior high. It's not exactly fair to compare the two. We get a little more verbal as we grow older. But the messages are primarily about how sweet, cool, nice, nerdy or whatever I was in the minds of those who signed my book. How it was great to get to know me. How our class rules and summer will be a blast. A few suggested "Call me!" with a house phone.

There aren't any TTYL, B4N or L8Rs...though, L8R did show up later. And now I feel old.

Discounted "Dragons" tickets

The circus is coming. And it's not like the ones you remember growing up.

Catch Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey presents DRAGONS at US Airways Center June 27 – July 2, 2012. The show gathers some of the greatest circus performers to honor the "Spirit of the Dragon." Ringmaster Johnathan Lee Iverson presides over this fantastical tournament of champions that combines mystic dragon lore with astounding circus feats and athleticism. We hear it's pretty amazing. Check out this video for a sneak peek.

And since you checked out my blog, I'm gonna share with the you Mom discount deal — $5 off tickets in the $15 and $25 price levels — valid on all show days and times except opening night. Opening night tickets are already 50 percent off except for front row and VIP seating.

To get your discount:

1. Log on to www.ticketmaster.com

2. Search Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Phoenix

3. Find your show date/time of choice (NOTE: discount DOES NOT work on Wednesday, June 27th as tickets for that show are already half price/excluding VIP and Front Row) and click “FIND TICKETS”

4. Under ENTER OFFER CODE/PASSWORD type MOM5

5. Under Select Prices click either $15 or $25

6. Then click OK (next to the MOM5 password)

7. Click on the section to choose your seats and follow the prompts to check out. The price when you click on those sections is reflective of the $5 off price.

Enjoy!

My top 10 Mother's Day wishes

Every year, advertisers pressure families to make sure to get "Mom" a memorable present. Mother's rings, a great outfit, perfume, digital cameras, romantic movies, running shoes, a spa treatment, etc. fill newspaper and TV ads. I can tell you the only thing that would make me happy from that list is a spa treatment. If I got running shoes, I might throw them. I'm not into jewelry. Clothes is nice, but...

What I really want doesn't necessarily come with a price tag. Here's my list:

A clean house. I prefer spending time with my family over cleaning, so cleaning house isn't my priority. But I still want a clean house. And if everyone just picked up their junk, or scrubbed their dish or put away their DVDs, I'd be one happy gal.

Some "me" time. I love my family, but sometimes I just want to be alone. The commute home isn't enough because it's stressful driving bumper to bumper.

No fighting/arguing for a full 24 hours. The day, actually most days, start well intentioned. But then...I know siblings fight. I did my share growing up. It's just that it gives me a headache. So stop it for just one day!

No mom drama from the school/neighborhood women and their kids. Sorry, ladies. Some of you and your kids come with more drama than I care for. Your family isn't perfect, nor is mine. So stop trying to one up everyone. It's childish and sometimes hurtful. Now, I do my best to pretend not to notice, but seriously! We are not in junior high. And all this drama does is teach our daughters to be petty, mean girls. Grow up!

A massage. This doesn't necessarily require an expensive spa visit. In fact, a nice massage from hubby can be so much better. Even a little neck rub when mommy is stressed can be fabulous.

A pedicure. Again, no expensive spa visit required. Just leave me alone long enough to enjoy soaking my feet and using that foot massager for my achy feet. I'm OK doing the filing and polishing. I just need a full hour alone to enjoy it.

A memorable meal not cooked by me. The best ones have been when my husband grills a little surf and turf and pours a good bottle of wine. Good conversation and some Spanish guitar or soothing music will complement the meal nicely

Some family togetherness/fun. Let's jump on those bikes, go for a swim or head out to a movie, concert, museum etc. without any grumpiness. We can break from our technology to actually talk, not text, and make memories.

No nagging. Believe me, I hate to do it. So just clean your room, finish your homework, pick up after yourself, and wash your face on your own. Please!

Privacy/no interruptions. I don't know why it's OK to barge in on me and have me stop everything to look for missing stuff or stop an argument. Please stop knocking on the bathroom door to talk to me, too. I really want privacy then.

I don't think I'm asking for much, am I? Please make this happen once in a while. It's great if it can happen today.

Cheers!

Bribing my daugher for my sanity

I spent much of the day smiling. Why? Because, as the cliché goes, money talks.

Essentially, my daughter had a mission to buy a laptop. I had a mission to keep my sanity.

So I did what I've long tried avoiding as a parent, the bribe.

"So what if instead of inviting so many friends, you just have three max spend the night?"

"What do you mean, Mom?"

"I'll give you money toward that laptop you want so much.

"What?"

"You heard me. I know some of your friends will be left out, but parties are expensive and exhausting for your mom."

She starts thinking. And oh is it difficult deciding what to do.

She runs through her friends. She always invites her closest buds, but she also invites a few new girls as well as her long-time friends who may not be as close these days. Let me just say that because of this effort for inclusiveness, her party turns into two or three parties in one, divided by cliques. I'm left dead tired trying to make sure drama is at a minimum. She's exhausted making sure everyone feels included.

She makes a list, and then she hesitates. "Can I invite more than three?"

"Sure, if you don't want all the money."

I feel a little guilty. But I'm too old for 10+ screaming pre-teens. And it's all about my sanity.

In the end only two girls would stay the night. Perfect.

She's happy because she now has a laptop. I'm happy because there wasn't the kind of drama that drove me insane the last few years.

Review: Disney on Ice presents 100 years of Magic

I took my family to opening night of Disney on Ice's current spectacular. The show, 100 Years of Magic, is at US Airways Center through April 15. It features Mickey and Minnie, of course, as well as Goofy, Donald Duck, Disney Princesses, Buzz Lightyear, Woody, Jiminy Cricket, Pinocchio, Mulan, Timon, Pumbaa, Stitch, Nemo and the Incredibles.

Tickets are as low as $11, excluding fees, when a minimum of four are purchased. You just need a special discount code that you can find in my blog. Details and restrictions are mentioned. Just click the link to learn more.

BTW, I tried the code for today's (4/13/12) 10:30 a.m. show and WOW! I could get a $24 ticket in section 102 for $11. Fees still apply no matter what ticket you buy. But the fees are less with the code. Just saying...

When I mentioned Disney on Ice, my teenager scoffed at first. "That's kid stuff!" But once he settled in, I saw a smile on his face. My daughter, who's 11 going on 18, whispers to me: "I'm still a kid. I love this."

It was an enjoyable evening. If you're a regular at these shows, it will seem familiar at times. The scenes and characters move quickly, but little ones will enjoy seeing a huge array of their Disney favorites.

Sharing some of my photos from the night — they tell you more about the night than I can in words. Hope you and your family get a chance to enjoy the show, too.

Color Mickey and Minnie

If you're going to the show this week, here's an activity: Coloring Mickey and Minnie. Just print out my blog. Enjoy the show.

Oh, and if you haven't gotten tickets yet, try using the moms discount code to get 4 tickets for $44 for select shows, while supplies last. Just click link to my earlier blog.

Disney on Ice trivia

Since Disney on Ice presents 100 Years of Magic comes to the Valley this week, I thought I'd share some fun trivia. It'll be fun to throw out some before the show. Maybe make it a game. The prize that you decide to give your kid is up to you. I'll post answers at the bottom...

BTW, remember you can get discounted tickets — 4 for $44 — with the code in my earlier Disney on Ice blog.

1. What is Geppetto’s profession?

2. According to the song, what is the only thing Pinocchio has to do when he wants his conscience to be his guide?

3. What character did Walt Disney say he created on a train ride from New York to California?

4. How many edges does a figure skating blade have?

5. What character uses the words, "Little puppet made of pine, wake, the gift of life is thine"?

6. What song includes the phrase, "An actor’s life for me"?

7. Who saves Pinocchio from the evil puppeteer and showman, Stromboli?

8. Which Disney character teaches you how to spell the word "encyclopedia" in a Mickey Mouse Club song?

9. What Disney dog was named after a planet?

10. What does Pinocchio wear in his hat?

11. What Disney villain lives in a wagon?

12. According to the Blue Fairy, what kind of wood was Pinocchio made of: oak, maple or pine?

13. What character always struck the gong at the beginning of the Mickey Mouse Club: Dumbo, Donald Duck or Goofy?

14. According to the Beast, where is the only place in the castle Belle is not permitted?

15. When was the United States Figure Skating Association founded?

16. In Toy Story, what toy is the song "You’ve Got a Friend in Me" about?

17. What does the Beast give Belle when she leaves the castle?

18. What do Pinocchio and the Beast have in common?

19. In Beauty and the Beast, according to LeFou, "No beast alive stands a chance against. . ." whom?

20. What is the longest word in any Disney song?

21. In Aladdin, what is the name of Jasmine’s pet tiger?

22.What Disney character from Aladdin does impersonations of Jack Nicholson, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Ed Sullivan?

23.According to the Genie, besides not allowing wishes for more wishes, what are the only three types of wishes he cannot perform?

24.What song includes the words, "They’re just lousy with loyalty"?

25.How many Academy Awards® did the film Aladdin receive?

26. In The Lion King, what is Timon and Pumbaa’s motto?

27. In Beauty and the Beast, who is Lumiere’s love interest?

28.What was the first official Winter Olympic sport?

29.What is the name of the lioness with whom Simba forms a romantic attachment?

30. Who wrote the "Mickey Mouse Club March" and the "Mickey Mouse Club Alma Mater"?

31. Who composed the songs for The Lion King?

32.The Lion King has an all-animal cast. What are the only two other full-length animated Disney features that have this distinction?

33. What Oscar®-winning actor provides the voice for Woody?

34. How many Mouseketeers were on the original Mickey Mouse Club during its first season: 12, 18 or 24?

35. Buzz Lightyear thinks he must defend the universe from what evil being?

36. How many teeth does Pumbaa the warthog from The Lion King have?

37. What makes Toy Story so unique?

38. During the song "I Will Go Sailing No More," what does Buzz Lightyear discover he cannot do?

39. In Beauty and the Beast, what is Belle’s favorite pastime?

40.What animated feature was called King of the Jungle during the early stages of production?

41.On what television network did the original Mickey Mouse Club air?

42. What group of animated characters is now referred to by Disney as "The Fabulous Five"?



And the answers:
1. Geppetto is a wood carver specializing in clocks, music boxes and toys.
2. All Pinocchio has to do is "give a little whistle."
3. Mickey Mouse
4. Two
5. The Blue Fairy uses these words in order to bring Pinocchio to life.
6. "Hi Diddle Dee Dee" by Leigh Harline, Ned Washington, and Paul J. Smith
7. The Blue Fairy saves Pinocchio from the bird-cage prison.
8. Jiminy Cricket
9. Pluto
10. Pinocchio’s hat has a red feather in it.
11. Stromboli (from Pinocchio)
12. Pine
13. Donald Duck
14. Belle is not permitted in the West Wing.
15. 1921
16. Woody
17. The Beast gives Belle a magic mirror so that she will "always have a way to look back and remember" him.
18. Both characters want to be human.
19. Gaston
20. Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious (there are 34 letters)
21. Rajah
22. The Genie
23. The three wishes the Genie cannot perform are: He can’t kill anyone; he can’t make anybody fall in love with anybody else; and he can’t bring people back from the dead.
24. "Prince Ali"
25. The film received two Academy Awards®, one for Best Song ("A Whole New World") and one for Best Musical Score.
26. "Hakuna Matata" – it means, "no worries."
27. The Featherduster
28. Figure skating
29. Nala
30. Head Mouseketeer Jimmie Dodd
31. The team of legendary singer-songwriter Elton John and the Tony Award-winning lyricist Tim Rice. Rice also won an Academy Award® for "A Whole New World."
32. To date, the only two films besides The Lion King to have an all-animal cast are Bambi (1942) and Robin Hood (1973).
33. Tom Hanks is the voice of Woody.
34. 24
35. The universe must be saved from the evil Emperor Zurg.
36. One
37. Toy Story was the first feature-length computer-animated film.
38. Fly
39. Reading
40. The Lion King
41. ABC
42. Mickey Mouse, Minnie Mouse, Donald Duck, Goofy and Pluto

Hunger documentary on Food Network

At home, we've been talking about food a lot. We discuss healthy eating habits and not so healthy splurges — everything in moderation, right?

Many of those talks stem from wanting our kids to be healthy and not part of the growing statistic of childhood obesity. We don't want to go overboard, either. Dieting isn't part of our children's vocabulary. Healthy eating is.

We haven't spoken much about hunger — at least not lately. We've mentioned how we're lucky. And when they don't want to eat their veggies, we point out how kids go hungry all over the world. They moan, but it's resulted in better eating habits.

Still, they're sheltered. Just once have we helped out serving meals to homeless, hungry families during the holidays even though we said we'd do it again. We need to do it again. We've participated in food drives, too. But you don't get the behind-the-scenes emotions of helping on a food line. Overall, they have little knowledge of what hunger is and how it affects families.

Last night, I got word that the Food Network will be airing a documentary tackling hunger. It airs at 8 p.m./7p.m. central time on April 14 and aims to not only highlight the plight of children going hungry in the United States, but also to promote community action. The hour-long documentary, Hunger Hits Home, is narrated by Oscar®-winning actor and longtime anti-hunger activist Jeff Bridges.


Food Network and the Share Our Strength "No Kid Hungry" initiative aim to eradicate child hunger in America by 2015 by surrounding children with nutritious food where they live, learn and play.

I plan to have our kids watch and figure out how we can be part of the solution.
You can click this link to download a guide to help you with your efforts: www.foodnetwork.com/hungry.

Fleeting Easter memories

Yesterday I went to Target specifically to buy two Disney DVDs for my kids' Easter baskets. It will be packaged with the swimsuits (daughter) and T-shirts (son) that I'd already bought on a previous bargain shopping trip. And I started thinking, will this be the last basket? The Easter Bunny stopped dropping off eggs a few years ago. Are gifts next to go?

I typically buy my kids — now 11 and 15 — something this time of year. It seems nice to package them together at Easter. Items of the past include swimsuits, DVDs, CDs, shoes, books, water guns and trading cards. It's part necessity (clothing) and part fun. Oh, and I can't forget a little chocolate so I can steal some. :)

My baskets are never elaborate. Sometimes they aren't even baskets. Anymore, everything goes into a bag that screams Spring is here! The baskets, along with the eggs, are in a bin in the garage. I'm not sure why I store them anymore.

I was never the mom who went all out on Easter. Crafts, Easter-themed activities, etc. weren't typical. I think we colored eggs twice, maybe three times. We had them hunt down eggs hidden in the backyard, and a few times went to community egg hunts. Lately we've gone to scavenger hunts since our kids aren't so little. Pictures with the Easter Bunny weren't the norm. I think the only one is from years ago at a hotel brunch, another rarity. I can count the Easter brunches out on my right hand. Fewer were spent with family since they are all so far away.

This Easter is already different than years past. It's the first year our kids have stuck out their Lent sacrifice without an slip ups (at least none that I know). Isn't this a bigger deal than egg hunts and baskets?

Still, I'm feeling sentimental about the Easter baskets and egg hunts. Will they hunt down their special egg? Would they pose with the Easter Bunny ever again? Are they expecting Peeps and chocolate bunnies or money? Or would they prefer just hanging with friends? The kiddie fun seems so fleeting. Wish it weren't.



Guess I

Instilling a giving spirit

I love that my daughter likes to help others. Her latest effort involved turning over two bags full of stuffed animals, some with tags still on them. She probably could have filled five bags. Maybe more.

She realizes that she's fortunate to have so many furry stuffed toys. She's also getting older and doesn't really need them. So we discussed how they could get another life with a family in need. I could have just bagged up for Goodwill. We often donated household items, toys and clothes donations there. But we wanted to give them to children who needed to be cheered up because of circumstances beyond their control.

We heard our local police department accepts gently used an new toys for its victims unit. We felt this is the way to best help. We also figured not a lot of people donate items there, so we dropped off two bags with bears, dogs, hippos, deer, cats, and more.

My daughter wants to expand her efforts to collect and donate stuffed animals. We've discussed the possibility of asking her elementary school to do a stuffed animal drive. Her brother wants to get involved, too.

As we left the police department today, my daughter says: "It feels really good to help someone out." I feel great hearing her say that.

Get a deal on Disney on Ice's 100 Years of Magic

Disney on Ice is back in the Valley April 12-15, 2012, at US Airways Center. This show, 100 Years of Magic, celebrates all that makes Disney fun for families. More than 65 of Disney's famously fabulous characters hit the ice to tell their stories. Among the Disney celebs are Mickey and Minnie Mouse, Goofy, Donald Duck, Disney Princesses, Buzz Lightyear, Woody, Jiminy Cricket, Pinocchio, Mulan, Timon, Pumbaa, Stitch, Nemo and the Incredibles.

I was given a code to share with my mom friends and followers so that your family can experience the show at a great price on select dates. The offer is 4 tickets for only $44, using code NALA. I understand this is the best discount available, so do share with your friends.

The code is good for shows at 10:30 a.m. and 7:30 p.m. on Friday, April 13; 7:30 p.m. Saturday, April 14; and 1:30 p.m. and 5:30 p.m. Sunday, April 15. The deal excludes Front Row and VIP seating. A minimum of 4 tickets is required, and additional tickets can be purchased for $11 each. No double discounts allowed. Service charges, handling and facility fees may apply.

Disney on Ice presents 100 Years of Magic is produced by Feld Entertainment. Check out info at www.disneyonice.com. Click on 100 Years of Magic to see a video of the show!

Butterfly exhibit at Desert Botanical Garden

It's back. The exhibit runs from 9:30 a.m. to 5 p.m. daily through May 13 at Desert Botanical Garden, 1201 N. Galvin Parkway Phoenix. You'll get to see many butterflies & take lots of cool pics. Cost is $3.50 per person older than 3 and FREE for members. More info: Butterflies at Desert Botanical Garden

While you're there, take a stroll through the garden. It's beautiful and the weather is great. Membership is reasonable, but if that's out of your budget, check out a Culture Pass at the library.

Sharing a few pics from my visit a few years back. Enjoy!

Manning up to a vow

I enjoy hearing great love stories. It makes me reflect back on what made made me fall in love with my husband. And don't we need a reminder from time to time? It's easy to get caught up in the flaws of a marriage.

That's why I loved reading "The Vow: The True Events that Inspired the Movie" (B&H Publishing Group, Nashville). It's a quick read at 180 pages, and much better than the movie. I say that because, well, the movie didn't spend time on the real emotions and frustrations that came out Kim and Krickitt Carpenter's tragedy. It instead focused on an exaggerated story to create more "stylized" drama. See my Movie Mama review. There's plenty of drama in the real story, it's just not as sexy as what was put on the big screen. And that's disappointing.

The book does hit on the couple's Christian faith, which wasn't at all mentioned in the movie. I don't understand why being a Christian has to be hidden. Even if you aren't, it's their story. It's is what keeps them fighting for each other when many others would have given up. I didn't find the mentions of their Christianity heavy handed or preachy in the book. It is what it is.

Their real story begins in late 1992 with a phone call. Kim falls for the sweet disposition of a girl taking his sportswear order and makes every effort to talk to her again. They soon meet and find they are made for each other. She moves to New Mexico and they marry. Ten weeks later, the newlyweds are heading to Phoenix for Thanksgiving dinner with family. But a tragic accident would forever change them.

The book is from Kim's perspective as a husband who watches the woman he loves in essence die before him. Krickitt not only is critically injured in a horrific crash, she forgets him entirely. Her personality — the one he falls in love with — also changes. But he's made a vow before God to love her for better or worse. It's definitely worse.

The book is written a lot like someone talking to a friend about what happened. He goes over their courtship and life together and the stark contrast of their post-trauma reality. How they treat each other is key to recovery. Kim is thinking his role now is to help her recover, so he finds himself in a role of a coach and caregiver instead of a husband. Krickitt is overwhelmed and frustrated. Imagine having someone tell you your married and you don't remember? Tension soars, and you start thinking these two won't make it. But Krickitt, who Kim came to know as a very devoted Christian, never loses her faith. She's lashing out and frustrated with Kim, but inside she's praying for guidance that she'll find the love she has for the husband she no longer remembers. He's seeking God for support, too, and must realize he also plays a role in diminishing their emotional distance.

Kim writes: "A year and a half after our wreck, I had finally resigned myself to the fact that my wife would never be the same person she had been before the accident....Krickitt never recovered her memory of our meeting, engagement, marriage, honeymoon, or anything of our life together before the accident." Heartbreaking! But they would opt to move forward together despite that huge hole in their relationship and the challenges it would create. It's those memories that help us build love and trust. They would need to start again. And they'd hit many rough patches getting there. In making it, they're inspiring.

I spoke with the couple briefly last week and the two things that struck me is Krickitt's ability to put the past behind and move forward. Don't we all get stuck in what was? She knew she couldn't dwell on the past and that she needed to be thankful for surviving a terrible crash. "It didn’t do me any good to go back to what I lost," she told me.

Kim told me he thinks it's strange that living up to his word to stand by his wife for better or worse is considered such a heroic thing. Isn't it expected? I'll share more of that conversation in another blog.

I definitely recommend picking up this best-selling book if you are looking for a little inspiration. It's made me look at my husband in a much more loving way. I can only hope it inspires many other relationships to focus on being better.

Cheers!

Love songs that I love

Right now I'm trying to come up with the Valentine's Day gift that we promised not to do. Shame on me, right? But it won't cost me a thing, just a little of my time.

I'm making my husband a playlist of love songs. One especially for him, and one made up of songs I love.

I'll sync the songs he likes onto his iPod and burn a CD of my songs for his car. This way, he can think of me just by hitting his CD shuffle.

So what songs will I add? I'll keep his list a secret, but I'm all about sharing. Here are some of my favorites:

Take My Breath Away by Berlin
Breathe by Faith Hill
At Last by Etta James
Underneath It All by No Doubt
Love Can Move Mountains by Celine Dion
Thank You by Dido
We Belong by Pat Benatar
Come to My Window by Melissa Etheridge
Love You Like a Love Song by Selena Gomez & the Scene
Total Eclipse of the Heart by Bonnie Tyler
Enchanted by Taylor Swift
How Do I by LeAnn Rimes
Sunday Morning by Maroon 5

Guess I'm pretty much done. Just a few more songs. So many that I like...

Happy Valentine's Day.

No Valentine's Day cards required - Yay!

I must admit, I'm thrilled my kids no longer give out Valentine's Day cards at school.

It's not that I didn't think it was adorable. I loved picking out the perfect perforated cards every year. I remember Scooby-Doo, Barbie, Bratz, Spider-Man, Yu-Gi-Oh! and many others. Some even came with those temporary tattoos for a little added fun. Sadly, for me, the mommy competition killed the the fun of putting together these cute Valentines. Seriously, do we need to attach THAT MUCH candy to an envelope that's half the size of a church donation card? And who has time for handmade ones?

Kids remember the kids with the good cards. That is the CANDY cards. And so the pressure for BETTER cards and candy begins. I started feeling cheap and withdrawn from the holiday because of the pressure. Which mom will go overboard? Will they talk about me behind my back because my kids' cards are plain. The tension was especially high when I was the moms editor at work.

Forget spending just $2 for cards that will be in the trash soon after. Plan on $10 per class for that extra candy. While I never went full-scale competitive, I caved into the kid pressure because I didn't want to look totally bad. I had no time to go fancy, but I did stick miniature chocolates a few times on those tiny cards. Who wants a lollipop? OK, not me! So there would be no way one of my children would offer a disappointing candy.

I'm sure not all moms see it as a competition. And maybe some moms just add the candy for fun. But when all it's supposed to be is a card exchange, adding candy creates mommy stress.

Why have that much candy coming home on Valentine's Day anyway? Don't we already have Halloween?

Cheers!

Talking to our kids about grandpa's stroke

This week my father-in-law had a major stroke. It's been a very emotionally draining time for our family. Everything seems to come to a stand-still while we wait, and yet life has to go on.

My husband left soon after getting news to be with his family. I wanted to go, too, but someone needed to stay home with our kids. My husband decided they should not see grandpa in his current state. They saw him once at the hospital a few years back. It was a freaky experience for them. This would be much more intense.

Of course this would leave me with the task of telling our kids just what happened. Death is possible; disability definite.

My husband cautioned me not to say too much. I felt it was important to prepare them for the just in case. They are 11 and 15.

I didn't make time to see what was on the web to talk to kids about strokes — there isn't much anyway. And I didn't look up anything about talking about death, as I didn't want to go there yet. Instead, I called them in for a family meeting shortly after dropping my husband off at the airport.

They saw their dad take off in a rush because grandpa was in the hospital. They needed to know what was going on, so I gave the basics and let them ask questions. They amazed me.

We talked about strokes (found a decent kid friendly description on KidsHealth later). I assured them that the doctors were working hard to make sure grandpa gets good medical care. No, he would never be the same, but he could improve. He could also get worse. We're spiritual, so we talked about God. I let them process and told them they could ask me questions as they came up.

The next two days, they'd have more questions about loss of speech, paralysis, memory loss, brain damage, recovering from a stroke, chances for it happening again, stroke prevention, dad's return home, visiting grandpa, etc.

Some questions were easier than others. I just told them what I know with a caring tone, and stayed focused on facts. If I didn't know, I said so. I also reminded them that we can't control what happens, but we can pray and know that our family and the doctors treating grandpa are trying to do right by him.

I also let their teachers know what was going on at home so they could tell me if their behavior changed. So far, so good.

Both kids have said they are sad, but they both said they'd be angry if they weren't kept in the loop. "We need to know what's going on," says my daughter.

My father-in-law is still at the hospital. We're still waiting to learn more. In the meantime, I'm on the web seeking info.

I found a few resources for younger kids. The Internet Stroke Center posted a children's book online called "When Grandpa Comes Home." It's a story about a girl who has to learn how to cope with the change in her grandfather after he has a stroke and moves in with her family.

Modern Medicine's site offers 10 tips for talking to kids about life-threatening illness.

If things turn for the worse, Hospice has some info about talking about death with kids and teens. KidsHealth also info about talking about death in age-appropriate ways.

We're hoping for the best.

Checking in: Quarterly goals

I'm feeling good. Setting a few goals for the quarter has inspired commitment to getting through my list.

So far, my Christmas inventory is nearly done. Ornaments are all put away. Boy did we have a lot of duplicate Hallmark ornaments! Just a few more boxes of outdoor decor need to be marked. Awesome.

I also have meals planned. My daughter keeps me on task here. She likes sharing her thoughts on what we should and shouldn't eat. But...

I found my weakness. I sometimes just don't WANT to follow my plan. So that's when I resort to fast food, as I did the other day. Wendy's was so easy and cheap thanks to its 99-cent menu. I need to do better here. Cooking ahead should help.

I haven't exercised as much, but that's been from a lack of time. Yes, I made an excuse! However that Christmas inventory, as well as putting it all away, was a bite. Next week will be better. Already I have plans to go to the zoo with friends. Good for walking around, and there are some hills.

I haven't been to the mall, so I'm not buying stuff I don't need...for now. :)

Cheers!

Forcing myself to plan ... at least our meals

I figure that I could save myself a lot of time if I just took 10-15 minutes in the morning to better plan out my day at home. I did this all the time at work. I kept a checklist and it kept me on task. At home, it's another story. More things than I want to acknowledge just pop up. So why keep a list? It only made me feel bad about how much was still left to do at the end of the day.

But I recently decided to start a list to plan meals better in hopes to save time and money. Funny thing is my daughter is the one making sure that I follow it. It's just a start, but it's going well.

Since my kids are still home on winter break, we have breakfast, lunch, snack and dinner on a calendar. We plan meals weekly on Saturday with everyone's input.

Everything we eat is based on what we have in our pantry or on our grocery list. No runs to the store that would waste time and gas. Yes, I'd run to the store or send my husband out for the littlest things. This often lead to unnecessary impulse purchases and wasted food.

As I prepare the following week's meal plan, I'm keeping track of items that I need to pick up and perishable that we need to use. Hmm, we need to eat those cucumbers soon!

My plan is to get everything at various grocery stores on a specific day, determined at the start of the week. And we must follow a list, so that we don't go to the store four times in a week or break our food budget.

My hope is we can keep this going forever. I know I'll be richer in time and money for it. As for the other home-project lists, I'm still working on getting those started.

Cheers!

Check out NBC's Smash at early screening Jan. 9

Every now and then, TV shows get the theater treatment. That is, a select audience gets to view it on the big screen. NBC's new show "Smash" gets this treatment on Jan. 9 at Tempe Marketplace. Download a pass to see the "Smash" screening, which begins at 7:30 p.m., at gofobo.com. It should make for a fun treat with a girlfriend or your teenager. The show premiere is set for 9 p.m. Feb. 6 on NBC (Channel 12/KPNX).

Essentially this is a show about a rising star searching for that big break and all the crazy behind-the-scenes drama of getting a musical on stage. Stars Debra Messing (Will & Grace), Jack Davenport (Flash Forward), Anjelica Huston and American Idol's Katharine McPhee. Also involved: executive producers Steven Spielberg and Craig Zadan & Neil Meron (producers of Chicago and Hairspray), and songwriters Marc Shaiman and Scott Wittman (Hairspray). Learn more about the show on Smash's web site.