Why I loved watching 'Ruby Sparks' with my tween

When I had the chance to preview Ruby Sparks before the movie was released, already I was thinking how great it would be to take my 12-year-old daughter to see this R-rated movie. Sure, there were a few "unconfortable-for-a-parent" discussions. But, I just knew our conversation about the movie would be awesome. It'd be the kind that helps a mom figure out how a daughter views relationships. This was a must. At least it was for me. :)

I decided to wait for the DVD, which came out Oct. 30. Ruby Sparks is now one of my daughter's favorite movies. She's put it on her Christmas list, since I only had the DVD on loan. Seriously.

The movie is R-rated for the adult situations and language. There's talk about sex, some profanity (including many F-words, but not as many as some cable shows) and a scene where some characters share a joint. These aren't things that I shy away from discussing with her. These are situations she will encounter in life. Better she get my thoughts on it than sneak in a movie and take her friend's opinions as the only truth.

If you've not heard of this movie, do check out the trailer:

My daughter and I spoke about ideal relationships, writing, controlling people, changing people, imperfection, etc. We spent a lot of time talking about Calvin's decision to rewrite his character, and how what he thought he wanted wasn't always really what he intended, as well as consequences of someone having the upper hand in a relationship. We're still taking about the movie, a week later.

Some possible questions, should you watch with your tween or teen:

-What are the pros and cons of being able to control another person's behavior? Might it be fun for a while or plain wrong?

-If you could, would you want to control how others act around you? On the flip side, how would you feel if someone could control you?

-How did it make you feel when Calvin started purposefully controlling Ruby?

-Have you thought about how you wish you could change other people (friends, family)? Has this film changed your mind about that?

-Can relationships ever reach perfection for either person? Explain.

-Would you end the movie in the same way?

Here's hoping there is a good deal on the DVD in the next few weeks. Mom, here, may just give in to this Christmas request. :)

Cheers!